Elevating Early Childhood

Working with Challenging Families in Preschool and Pre-K

Episode Summary

Today I'm tackling a topic that every single one of us has encountered at one point or another, and that is working with challenging families or caregivers. Now, I know what you're thinking. Challenging families. Oh boy, here we go. But before you roll your eyes, stick with me because we're going to flip the script on this topic and approach it in a way that might just make your job a little easier and a whole lot more fulfilling.

Episode Transcription

[00:00:00] Hey there, teachers! Welcome back to another episode of Elevating Early Childhood, the podcast where we dive into the ins and outs of teaching little learners and making a big impact in the classroom. I'm your host, Vanessa, and today we're tackling a topic that every single one of us has encountered at one point or another, and that is working with challenging families or caregivers.

Now, I know what you're thinking. Challenging families. Oh boy, here we go. But before you roll your eyes, stick with me because we're going to flip the script on this topic and approach it in a way that might just make your job a little easier and a whole lot more fulfilling. Okay? So, let's start by setting the scene.

Picture this, it's the beginning of the school year, and your to do list is longer than the line at your favorite coffee shop on a Monday morning. You've got to get parents and caregivers to fill [00:01:00] out mountains of paperwork, bring in shot records, and provide an extra change of clothes. Don't even get me started on that topic, right?

These are the basic requirements, the non-negotiables, if you will. But then, as the school year goes on, there are all these quote unquote other things that we try to get parents to do. You know, the basics, like getting their kids to school on time, supporting their child's development at home, or even just getting them to wear the required school uniform if you have one.

And honestly, these things can be so challenging, especially when you've got a whole classroom full of little ones who depend on you, right? Sometimes it can feel like you're fighting an uphill battle. You know what I mean? If you've ever caught yourself thinking, how can I get Kobe to be on time for school?

How can I get Marco to wear the required school uniform? Or, how can I get Izumi's mom to [00:02:00] support what we're working on with her at home? Then I want you to know, you're not alone. What you are is a dedicated early childhood professional who wants the best for your students, and that is why you care so much, right?

But let's be real for a second, okay? It's so easy to get frustrated when you feel like parents aren't following through at home, or worse, when you start to think they just don't care. But what if I told you that your job as an early childhood professional goes beyond the children in your classroom?

What if it actually extends to supporting their families? Now, I can already hear some of you thinking, Vanessa, I've already got enough on my plate as it is. Don't add to it. And you are absolutely right. But stay with me here, okay? If we want our preschoolers to [00:03:00] learn how to be empathetic, to understand and care for others, then we must model that empathy ourselves.

Starting today. with how we interact with their families. Let's face it, not every family is going to have it all together. Some of your students might come from under resourced communities, or they may have experienced trauma themselves. And that's where empathy becomes your most powerful and important tool.

Even families that may seem affluent or well off might be dealing with challenges we just can't see on the surface. For So, what if we flip our thinking? What if we assume that all parents and families and caregivers love their children and are doing the very best they can with what they've got? I know, I know, it's easier said than done, I get it.

But pushing our personal biases out of the way and leading with empathy can make [00:04:00] all of the difference in the world. The more we try to get families to do something, whether it's arriving at school on time, following school policies, or supporting learning at home, the more we might find ourselves in a power struggle.

So, let's reframe this, right? Let's take a step back and approach these situations from a different angle. And I'm going to walk you through a few examples of how you can do this in your own classroom. Let's start with Kobe, who's always arriving late. Instead of focusing on what Kobe's family or caregivers are not doing, like getting to school on time, try this instead.

When his parent or caregiver comes to pick him up, say something like, We really miss Kobe's smiling face each morning during our circle time. Is there anything I can do to help you drop him off before 8am? Notice I didn't say on time because those words could put the parent on the defensive right off the bat.

By opening [00:05:00] up the conversation in this way, you might just learn something that changes your perspective entirely. Maybe Kobe's parents work late, and they just can't get him there any earlier. Or maybe they're struggling with getting him out the door in the morning. This is your chance to offer a helpful solution.

Maybe like a picture schedule like this one that will help make their mornings run more smoothly. Now let's talk about Marco. Remember, he never wears his uniform. So instead of getting frustrated and thinking, why can't they follow the rules? Approach it with empathy instead. When you see Marco's parent or caregiver say something like, I'm so glad to see Marco at school every day.

He's a great role model for others. Then if the opportunity arises, you can gently say something like, I noticed he's not in uniform often. Is there anything I can do to help? And this opens the door for the parent to share what might be going on. [00:06:00] Maybe they don't have the time or the money to get the uniform.

If that's the case, you can offer resources like a flyer with information or assistance. And what about Izumi's mom, who seems to be struggling to support what you're working on in class? Instead of trying to get her on board, start with a positive. You might say, we love having Izumi in our class. She's always smiling and ready to start the day.

We're working on helping her become more independent by putting on her own backpack and coat. How's that going for you at home? This invites the parents to share what's working. or not working at home. If they're facing challenges, you can offer practical suggestions like a step-by-step visual guide or even a meeting to model and provide support.

And remember, not all families will be ready or willing to take your advice right away, and that's okay. [00:07:00] Just because they're not ready now doesn't mean they won't be at some point in the future. So, what's the big takeaway from all this, right? It's simple. We can't get others to do what we want. But what we can do is change our perspective.

We can move from a place of frustration to a place of empathy. Where we ask, how can I help? Instead of, why aren't you doing this? Right? When we approach families, with understanding and support, we not only make our jobs a little easier, but also create a more positive, collaborative environment for our students to thrive.

Thank you so much for tuning in to this episode of Elevating Early Childhood. I hope you found some practical tips and a fresh perspective to take back to your classroom. And remember You're doing incredible work, and by extending [00:08:00] empathy to the families you work with, you're making an even bigger impact.

Now if you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe, share it with your fellow educators, and leave us a review on iTunes. I'd love to hear your thoughts. Until next time, I'm Vanessa, Onward and Upward!